By Kendra Holliday | August 21, 2019
The past couple years, I’ve struggled with mental health issues.
Here is why:
- Menopause – I have severe symptoms. It’s like going through puberty again, ugh!
- Alcohol addiction – I was stress drinking, which was making things much worse.
- Genetics – my family is prone to mental illness.
- Life stressors – my aging parents, my daughter moved out, sensitivity to my client’s baggage and trauma.
I go through periods where I can’t function, and it SUCKS!
I’m glad to say I’ve been enjoying a few good weeks, phew! I made this video to show myself for when I am down again:
My therapist Dr. Diane Sanford wrote a book called Stress Less Live Better: 5 Simple Steps to Ease Anxiety, Worry, and Self-Criticism. In it, she speaks of the teachings of Buddha: “To end suffering, we must retrain our minds to be aware and allow whatever happens without trying to cling to pleasure or avoid pain.”
Ahhh, that’s interesting. I’m practically allergic to suffering, especially the suffering of others, so how can I cope with it better?
I created a Sanity Plan. My Sanity Plan is a living document I update or refer to whenever necessary. My friend Metta May has a similar setup – she calls it H.E.L.P. – Hoes Enjoyin’ Living Plan! Maybe something like it will help you, too. After all, most of us are dealing with our share of stress, and it can get overwhelming. We need all the balance we can get! Depression, anxiety, and addiction are ravaging our country – shit is WAY out of whack!
Here are the key components of my Sanity Plan:
I list the things that are causing me stress/bumming me out.
Next, I list some good ol’ gratitude. What are the good things in my life?
For instance, if I’m getting frustrated with catty women, I think about all the good women in my life.
Or if I’m annoyed with men who are a pain in the ass, I review all the good men I know.
I think about things to look forward to – I have a couple trips planned this year, to Colorado and Florida, yay!
I remember the causes I support – making a difference and giving back helps me feel better.
Then, I’ll review my list of tools for finding balance and feeling better.
My self-care list includes supplements I’m taking, books, podcasts, types of therapy, exercise, music, massage, LEGOs, my meditation app, and of course, SEX!
The good things in life can be small and simple. Here is an example:
It’s so nice to be feeling good right now! The better I feel, the more I can be of service to others.
What does YOUR Sanity Plan entail? If you’d like help creating one, you can book a consult with me. Or, we can just talk about sex, that’s always fun!