You Are The Sexy Bohunk Kind: CapnMarrrrk
Filed under: You Are The Beautiful Kind - August 20, 2008 @ 6:00 am
Alias: CapnMarrrrk
Age: 41
Relationship status: Married
Sexual orientation: Straight, but some men make me feel oddly uncomfortable in my belly. I have no idea what that means. I’m not sure if I’ll ever investigate.
Favorite physical feature on yourself: My slappy bald head
Tattoos/piercings: See Picture + OM on my right wrist.
Charity you support: National MS Society. I’m riding in the MS Bike Ride this year. I hope to get my 150 miles in. You can sponsor me here.
What game did you like playing as a kid? I was awful at all sports and didn’t have any friends, so I had a very vivid imaginary life in which I starred as a superhero spaceman fighting the Evil Empire and having adventures with big-boobed Space Princesses.
When was the last time you cried? 5 Years Ago when we had to put my sick cat down. I don’t like to cry even though it’s a Goodness. It hurts so much that I’ve blocked it all off.
What do you want to learn/add to what you already know? I am teaching myself to figure draw, primarily women because I love everything about the smooth, sinuous shape of your bodies. Men just don’t do it for me.
Special skill/talent, what are you really good at? (non-sexual): I’m told I’m a good writer, and I have a talent for creating characters and scenes full-on from my right-hemisphere.
Special skill/talent, what are you really good at? (sexual): Cunnilingus. I could spend all day down there if I was allowed.
How old were you when you lost your virginity?19. It was the first time I’d ever seen a naked woman in the flesh, touched a breast, possibly eaten a pussy, and put on a condom. It was clumsy, messy, sloppy and drunken…ROCK ON! Later I to seek out a second condom and my date asked me to be discreet, but I couldn’t find anyone in my Frat (hush you!), until I walked into a roomful of my buddies smoking weed and announced I needed “a protection-type device.” But the next day, I was like, “Holy Shit, I’m a Man!” I had to wait until everyone was done showering, and shower alone because I was sporting a serious club. Unfortunately, minus one awful one nighter, I wouldn’t have real sex for another 2 fucking years after that. Talk about banished from the Garden of Eden!
What are your masturbation habits? How often? Where? Props? Near Daily in the Library with the Lotion and the Internet Porn. If I were smart, I’d ditch the porn and go back to imagination because I discovered it takes extra long to work it out with the brain.
Are you a tits, ass, pussy etc. man? What kind of question is that? I’m wholistic baby! I can’t even fathom how someone could be an “x” man. Everything looks different on different women. There are small breasted women with great asses, and big breasted women with flat asses, or slim hipped women with great legs. It all depends on who it is. I like it all.
What do you fantasize about? What’s your fetish? What turns you on? I would say I dig physically strong women. My earliest fantasies were of superhero women, long before puberty I was dreaming of Bat Girl, Supergirl and Wonder Woman. I’d love to go beyond man/woman, passive/aggressive, sub/dom games and just fuck like Gods. Though if I’m being more earthly, a Gymnast, Yogini or Dancer would be extremely cool. Not wishing to be to be repetitive, but all the pictures I’m drawing from are nude gymnasts. Hey, I’m starting to see a connection.
Are you cut or uncut? Cut, but more importantly, I’m technically, above average.
What would you do at an orgy? I suppose it depends on how attractive I find the participants. I have crazy-high, unrealistic standards… thanks Mass Media. But, if it all worked out I’d dive right in. I mean who doesn’t want to be surrounded by warm, willing flesh? Or I think it would be cool to try and do some on the spot figure drawing. “Hey you, hold still will ya? I’m trying to draw.”
What was one of the hottest moments of your life? Looking back into the past, they are all blending together. I mean, what constitutes “hot” when all experiences end up with orgasms? Was it the time I finally got a real girlfriend and I was first initiated into constant, hassle-free sex? Was it when I first started fucking the woman who would be my wife? I think of sex as a phase space where the Past, Present & Future collapse into the Now of physical pleasure. At that time all nerves are firing sensations, and it’s all lips, tongues, nibbles, biting, scratching, probing & plundering. Costumes, scenarios & words are all just condiments: they enhance the flavor but aren’t the meal itself. When all is said and done, laying there in the wet spot, totally spent, is always the hottest moment.
You have one night to completely pleasure your lover. What do you do? Gosh…I believe it depends on the lover. I’m a giver, so I could go for a long time, stroking, kissing, licking and eating my partner with no expectation of reciprocity. I’m sure there will be probing to test limits and then go from there. I won’t say I’m the greatest lover in the world, but I’ll do what it takes to make my lover happy.
August 20th, 2008 at 8:07 am
“I think of sex as a phase space where the Past, Present & Future collapse into the Now of physical pleasure.”
This is so true, I think most of us would have to admit to this. We are in that “now” of the physical pleasure, and it’s amazing how you aren’t thinking of anything else in those moments.
If you ever want a live model, I’d be happy to pose
I’m “small breasted with a great ass”.
August 20th, 2008 at 8:11 am
Douglas Adams tat….I like him already.
August 20th, 2008 at 8:20 am
Smart, funny, sexy- Wow! I think I love you!
August 20th, 2008 at 8:38 am
Hmm, that dude looks kinda familiar.
August 20th, 2008 at 9:43 am
Dor–Erik Avari from The Mummy
http://www.starpulse.com/news/media/Erik_Avari.jpg
August 20th, 2008 at 9:44 am
A much much younger Erik Avari, of course.
August 20th, 2008 at 9:48 am
I like this one!
August 20th, 2008 at 9:55 am
I hear Perry Farrell a lot. I used to hear Gilligan when I was younger and substitute teaching. Do you know how hard it is to maintain classroom order with people calling your Gilligan? I handed out a lot of detentions. It took 40 years, but I finally grew into my face.
@RBGirl…I saw your TBK, and I’d be honored, though right now I’m a poor artist. If you want, I can set you up with my “model pimp” and sign you up for a group thing where better artists than I will draw you and let you keep some illustrations (if your local to STL). If not feel free to send me some photos I can practice on with as much nudity as you feel comfortable doing.
@Chiavata: Thanks! I’ve been working out since April and I actually feel sexy for a change. I think I’m going to enjoy my day in the sun.
August 20th, 2008 at 10:08 am
all this AND you love keller williams? very nice!
did you ever fantasize about isis? i sure did… ‘oh mighty wind which blows on high, lift me now so i can fly’
August 20th, 2008 at 10:12 am
Yeah, I read the Cap’n to avoid work and am always amused. I would definitely fuck his brain. Not like through his eye sockets or anything that literal, but ya know, mind fuck stuff…
August 20th, 2008 at 11:14 am
He gives me goosebumps, makes me feel wobbly and weak. His hands are warm, his body hot. When his skin touches mine we melt together. All that energy… I give in and close my eyes.
My body is his temple. He worships me. His lips (soft meaty lips) kiss and lick every inch of me. I ache for more, I ache for his mouth between my legs. He teases me, ignores my whimpers but eventually splits my pomegranate and suckles on my seeds. Bolts of pleasure shoot up and down my body. I roll my eyes up and ask for more. And as the good “giver” that he is, he obliges.
August 20th, 2008 at 11:46 am
*swoon* I’ve got the same tattoo. I’ll go back and actually read now…
August 20th, 2008 at 11:57 am
i would love to see ms. bianca as a yatbk…
August 20th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Love ya, Capn but DAMN!! Bianca’s words make this that much better -
“He worships me. His lips (soft meaty lips) kiss and lick every inch of me. I ache for more, I ache for his mouth between my legs. He teases me, ignores my whimpers but eventually splits my pomegranate and suckles on my seeds.”
I second Dragonfly Sister’s motion… all in favor?
August 20th, 2008 at 12:18 pm
AY! I’m in favor!
August 20th, 2008 at 12:23 pm
I’m so tickled….love it.
I will send lucky Bianca the details…
August 20th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
Yes, I have to agree with the above, Bianca made that totally hot! I can’t wait to see her YATBK.
August 20th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
I <3 your photo Capn, and Bianca totally makes this!! Reminds me of someone I know…
August 20th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
hell - - - oooo !
August 20th, 2008 at 9:11 pm
wow… i feel like I’ve stolen Capn’s thunder. I am humbled by the calls and working on some answers.
August 21st, 2008 at 8:30 am
It’s great to get to know the Cap’n a bit better. That tattoo is one of the coolest I’ve ever seen–so iconic, yet this is the first one I’ve seen. That suggested my next tattoo, “Don’t Panic” on the very tip of my cock.
I don’t know how many of these male versions TBK has done yet, but this is the first one I’ve read and I think it’s a great idea.
August 21st, 2008 at 10:34 am
AY AY CAP’N ! ! !
yes bianca definitely needs to be a YATBK ! ! !
i like your style capnmarrrk. i can tell you have a fun joyful,playful hold on life.
people like you help balance out the world from people who are overly serious like me.
looks like the ladies are ready for a taste Cap’n !!!
\
Beau- you officialy just spoke of the most painful tattoo location in the world. you’d have to get your cock hard, and the amount of blood that would spray out might drop you to the floor. reminds me of THE DOOM GENERATION, where he has Jesus tattooed on his cock, so women can say that they have jesus inside of them !!!
August 21st, 2008 at 11:00 am
*adding Capn to my personal ‘fuck you’ list*
*scribbling in Bianca’s name too*
I’m with Sandra - brains are erotic as hell, and it looks like Capn and Bianca have ‘em in spades.
August 21st, 2008 at 1:23 pm
CapnMarrrrk~ You are lean and strong like a biker would be! Plus you have the same tan lines as I do, a dead give away-I’m forever wishing I could get rid of the sock line, its much hotter on a guy! At least i can wear skimpier bike tops as a chick.
August 21st, 2008 at 2:01 pm
chiavata: I’m trying to be. I have such an average build that it’s hard to get super lean like those other bikers that blow past me on the road, but I try. Yeah for skimpy bike tops!
I’m doing the MS ride this year and always on the look out for eye candy. And oh yeah, your YATBK is awesomely hot!
Saphh~ for adding us to your list. Like I tell Bianca, it’s nice to be desired by someone other than your spouse from time to time. I like to think we are S-M-R-T!
August 21st, 2008 at 2:24 pm
I’ve only been super lean, once in my life, the ONLY way I was able to do it was by eating a VERY strict diet. Im a big food geek, so thats hard for me to pull off for very long. I do miss 14% body fat though!
August 21st, 2008 at 8:36 pm
Dor, if you’re lifting you don’t need a STRICT diet, you need a CLEAN diet, it’s much easier. My body fat is 12.9%, pretty low for a girl. But i eat a LOT. And i LOVE to eat. I’m not into depriving myself so I indulge in my foodiness on the weekend or when I go to party or something, just not every day. And when it comes to the good stuff you just have to remember to do it in moderation. Oh wait, what am thinking? That word probably isn’t in your vocabulary!
Thanks again, Capn, and YOWZA right back atcha! You have to lift and do plyometric work to strengthen your legs for biking. How long is the MS ride? Have you done it before? What’s your time like?
August 21st, 2008 at 9:29 pm
chiavata: I’ve beginning to do more interval in running. I’ve only been riding on weekends (one day a wash b/c I ride with a pokey friend), but I’ve been going to a boot camp several times a week to get whipped by a 47 year old hard bodied former stripper & pole dancer.
I’m hoping to do a 150 miles in two days of rolling Missouri Hills, but I’ll be happy if I do 75 the first day and 40 the second. I can usually do the 40 in under 3 hrs, but it’s supposed to be a casual ride not a death dealer.
Re: plyometrics-looks interesting. I’ll have to investigate…thanks!
August 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 am
For me running makes the biking feel easy. I like interval training, too, it breaks it up and makes it interesting while building speed. I work out with a trainer twice a week who kicks my ass the same way as your boot camp trainer. He changes up the routine every session so I never know what’s coming. I’m impressed with your riding capability. Two days? 150 miles? WOW! MTB is so different. I plan to start doing duathlon (run,bike,run) next year, I know I can place in my age category. I’m saving for a road bike, I road ride once a week for 16 to 20 miles but doing it with a mountain bike is tough. The only good thing is that the mtb suspension saves my cookie from too much bruising!
August 22nd, 2008 at 8:47 am
I had my mtb tricked out with slicks for a much smoother ride, but now I have a road bike that 10-12lbs lighter. It makes a huge difference, as does the suspension. I’ve noticed now how much bumpier the ride is and how crappy the streets are.
Ride safe!
August 22nd, 2008 at 11:46 am
I just ordered a Jamis road bike to replace my old MTB, its not a real fancy one but a good one. Chiavata, I am a SUPER moderate person, maybe I don’t come off that way but I am all about quality over quantity.
August 25th, 2008 at 10:05 am
I’m teasing, Dor. And I’m not into dead bodies, don’t get the wrong idea!! Too bad we don’t all live near one another, I’d love to ride with you guys!
August 25th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
Dor are you a local STLian?
August 25th, 2008 at 12:21 pm
chiavata: Yes it would be fun. Oh you meant “with” not “on”. Yeah, that would be fun too.
August 26th, 2008 at 10:19 am
Yep, Im here in St Louis Capn.
August 26th, 2008 at 10:31 am
Nice, Capn….
August 26th, 2008 at 11:19 am
He is super hot. Love his answers too. Mmm… I want some Cap’n Marrrrk.
August 26th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
His Little Slut:
Even though I have a beard?
Thanks for your comment: xoxo
September 4th, 2008 at 4:09 am
~Capn~/~Bianca~ Is it warm in here or is it me!? WOW!
~Bianca~ I so love your vivid description and have melted away…in ecstacy.
~Capn~”what constitutes “hot” when all experiences end up with orgasms?” Could not have said it better myself. Great to get to know the Capn a little better…