Why Am I Not Getting Laid? Devesh
Filed under: Why Am I Not Getting Laid? - April 24, 2008 @ 6:00 amHere is a cute virgin from India. Like I know anything about India’s dating culture. This will be fun.
Name: Devesh, 20, Male
Do you want to fuck men, women, or both: Women
Last time you got laid: Never. How I can explain that further, i have no clue… 
Where do you live? India.
Your living arrangement: With parents. Moving out this summer.
Job situation: In college. I reckon that rings the “everybody gets laid in college” bell. Not here.
Fashion sense: Jeans, t-shirts (i love the batteres ones. you know the ragged out pieces anyone would discard or recycle?), or long sleeve shirts (nice, branded, starched ones. Or the “party” kind.)
Grooming habits: Shower at least once a day. Cologne: Old Spice
Do you drink? Not at all. But people don’t mind it (after all this time). Heck, they love gettin’ sloshed when I’m around. They kinda know I’ll get ‘em home.
Addicted to anything? Working out. It has ruled my life for the past 5 years. Beyond that, I make it a point to NOT get addicted to anything, so I never have a weakness. Explains why I never took the golden drag, even while a dozen people smoked up in the same room as me.
Hobbies: I used to be really into art in junior high. Then sang in high-school, but that was too little too late, so never made an on-stage performance. The work-out again fits here perfectly, as i have been at full-time (as a hobby beside college) since graduating school.
Places you hang out: Cafes, mostly. or a bar/pub. i almost never hang out without a friend/friends, if at all possible. If I had better company I would go see an art exhibition or a live music performance, or attend a book-reading. or something along those lines.
Do you have many close friends of your own gender? Yes, loads. loyal an’ all…
Do you have many close friends of the opposite gender? A few. Like gfs of the above mentioned friends, and a few pals of my own.
How many people (of your target gender) do you currently know that you would like to fuck? What are the obstacles with each one (why aren’t you fucking them?) Five or six of them. And my guess is nearly all, if not ALL, believe they have to be in a “relationship” to fuck. I don’t. BIG problem.
What do you like to eat? Clean food. Best example would be Subway. Roast-Chicken. A few Indian dishes. Nothing fried or sugary consists of my definition of clean food.
What kind of porn do you like? The kind where the girl orgasms for real. But really, the kind of porn I DON’T like is gay/BDSM. I haven’t seen much porn for a long time. (like 3-6 months, and that too was an accidental download)
What’s your fetish? What turns you on? Pregnant babes. Notice “babes”.
Are you dom or sub: Complete DOM. I’m the “I’LL DO IT” guy.
On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate yourself when it comes to physical appearance (1 is hideous, 10 is model)? 7.5 going on 8.75 
[mothers of gal-pals have described me as cute. never the girls themselves ]
Using that same scale, what’s the minimum number you expect your partner to be? Given the present scenario, even 6.5. heck, 5 will do.
One word to describe your voice: Spontaneous. Lousy word for a voice.
Your thoughts on breeding (have kids, wants kids, would you date someone who had kids?) I don’t have any. I wouldn’t mind having them either. I would date someone who has kids; which has nothing to do with my current situation (sex-starved).
Religion: Atheist
Charity you would give money to: None. Would rather do charity stuff myself.
Political affiliation: Considering the caste-politics prevalent in my part of the world, I’d say secular.
Music you listen to: Industrial Rock, Trance, Metal.
Movies you have loved: Roman holiday, Casablanca, The Last Samurai, Gone In 60 seconds, Don Juan de Marco, The Usual Suspects, Wall Street, Fight Club, Schindler’s List, The Godfather Trilogy.
Do you like to read? If so, what? I liked reading “The Godfather” so much I must’ve read it five times over. I liked Perry Mason, and a few other books. but now, most of my reading comes through the internet (blogs, websites, etc.)
Restaurant you like: Hole-in-the-wall joints. And SUBWAY!
Person you respect/admire: The Governator (Politician, Movie Star, Body-building star, what else could I possibly want?). Ram Jethmalani. (self) Made-men mostly. like first-generation gazzilionaires.
Past relationship history: I’ve been in love once. I had a relationship that lasted six-months (I called it off). Not in love with anyone right now.
Any STDs? phhhh. NO sex. No disease.
The Beautiful Kind’s verdict: I think it’s pretty normal for a 20-yr-old guy living with family to be a virgin, the circumstances aren’t ideal. But you are moving out this summer! You should try a night out on the town. I’m not sure what to tell you about the women who want a relationship if they’re going to have sex - maybe try for older women? You know, like your friend’s moms. You need to find someone more seasoned and relaxed than the college crowd, since that’s not working for you. Or hey get a job at the gym and do what the guy is doing in the pic above - that’ll get you laid. And for the love of god, ditch the Old Spice and get some better cologne. That might solve your problem right there. xoxo
April 24th, 2008 at 9:28 am
Dude, the main reason some women go to the gym is to get hot guys to “spot” them. So I definitely agree with the get-a-job-at-the-gym suggestion.
I do have a soft spot for Old Spice, though…
April 24th, 2008 at 9:28 am
ok devish, it sounds like n my opinion your goal for the next 6 months is to motivate and meet people you DO want to hang out with more often. Sounds like you stray away from people who don’t quiote understand you and what you like. The truth is, their are people out there waiting for you. similar people. i think you should try and meet new people, since you are unhappy with your current social setting. Life is a constant process of meeting new people and filterinmg through all the normal people, trying to find the special ones who click with YOU!
You sound like an open minded guy, who just hasn’t found your “scene ” yet. Keep in mind, sometimes there is no scene for you, so you have to make your OWN scene. Meaning do what YOU wanna do, and along the way you are bound to meet people who love the same stuff.
Good luck buddy, i can’t wait for you to feel what it’s like to slide it in the first time ! ! ! !
April 24th, 2008 at 10:23 am
You’re still young Devesh, keep doing what your doing and you’ll do fine. The fact that you’re addicted to working out alone is a HUGE plus. If you lived here you would probably be a player by now! I have heard though that India is much more traditional than the US about the roles of men and women. Women there may not be as impressed with a hot bod as American chicks.
April 24th, 2008 at 10:25 am
Everyone doesn’t get laid in college in india? Or just in your particular situation?
I find that everyone does get laid in college around here. Even the nerdiest, weirdest looking kids can find a girl that’s willing to fuck them. And my school is only 25% female.
If you really want to get laid in college, go to a liberal arts school. Women tend to greatly outnumber the menz there. And the guys that are there are either gay or in relationships.
April 24th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
Valentine: NOT everyone. Trust me.
Devesh: Keep pumping the iron brutha. Take no shit from anyone, study seduction and attraction theory, and don’t follow any bad advice columnists in the media, on the web or otherwise…that’s teaching men to be women, not men. Don’t make the same mistakes I did. You’ll be fine…but get it done while you’re young.
April 24th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
I think you will be fine. One thing I kept thinking while reading it was that if you are “addicted” to working out, you probably have a smoking body. With that said maybe its a little intimidating to girls? Im taking a stab in the dark here, but i know that the only time I have had the guts to talk, and keep talking to a gym-addicted guy is when he made it easy for me to see that he was nice, and didn’t think he was better than me because he worked out 8 days a week. Maybe it is just in my area, but usually gym rat= asshole. Do you hit on girls often? just make sure seem approachable and laid back and not like the russian guy from rocky and i think you will do splendidly.
April 24th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
the virgin: I suppose all the people who really try. I guess they also have to have a certain level of social skills.
April 24th, 2008 at 3:18 pm
I know a woman that used to be married to a guy from India and so I got to know several Indian guys here in St Louis. His name was Pankag(sp) but all of her friends called him punk ass.
My question for you is… What is your attitude like? What do you feel the world owes you and who do you think you are better then?
Do you believe in the social caste system that makes so many people from your culture act like they are better then the rest of us and we are just untouchables?
I have met dozens of Indian guys that walk around St louis with the attitude that the world owes them everything, they are entitled to everything and they are better then everyone.
So check your attitude, you might be scaring away people with what you think is self confidence but is really asshole. But the combination of admiration for self made men and the fact that you are self admittedly addicted to going to the gym makes me think you have an attitude that repeals women faster then the old spice.
April 24th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
very often a person’s weakness is in fact their fear of weakness. as strength is very often knowing ones weaknesses. i wouldn’t be afraid of weakness, I’d be afraid of never knowing your true weaknesses.
April 27th, 2008 at 8:04 am
Old Spice is kind of nostalgic, and may be a plus if you do take TBK’s advice and try for older women. Also, I agree with Insomniatic. I admit that I generally think that fitness buffs and jocks are assholes until proven otherwise because so many of the ones that I have known have played to type.
August 15th, 2008 at 3:10 am
No update on the situation? The thing is, esp in India and since he lives with his parents, the prob of sex is nil. Hopefully he had more luck after moving!