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The Beautiful Kind

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I Would Rather Sleep With Kathy Bates Than These Female Actors

Filed under: Vexed - September 26, 2007 @ 7:15 am

Note: This list was hard to come up with since I gave up my guilty pleasure of reading People magazine 3 years ago.

kate_hudson.jpgNaomi Watts (Someone once told me I have nipples like hers which I found horrifying because hers are like bendy straws.)
Kate Hudson (She wears dark eyeliner and it makes her look strangely mean.)
Eva Mendes (Hitch was the worst movie EVER.)
Scarlett Johansson (Her mouth looks like a Valentine and this annoys me.)
Jennifer Jason Leigh (She makes retro films seem like a bad idea.)
Sara Jessica Parker (I hoped having a baby would fatten her up a bit.)
Claire Danes (She’s STILL playing the spoiled brat role?)
Uma Thurman (She’s STILL on my shit list.)
rene-zellweger.jpg Sandra Bullock (Her acting face is set to “look confused.”)
Renee Zellweger (Pout. Squint.)
Lindsay Lohan (I don’t even know who this is but I’m sure she’s annoying.)
Hillary Swank (ugh ugh UGH.)
Jennifer Grey (I still haven’t forgiven her for her double crime of Dirty Dancing and a nose job.)
Portia De Rossi (She was so cute a few years ago, but has since gotten too stringy and overly made up.)
Kirsten Dunst (I don’t know why, but I kindof want to smack her.)

Are you sensing a pattern? Apparently I don’t care for skinny blonde women with the optional pretentious name or perpetual squinting habit.

4 Comments to “I Would Rather Sleep With Kathy Bates Than These Female Actors”

  1. Mon-Mon Says:
    September 26th, 2007 at 7:45 am

    Now that is interesting… you have a great bod - cute and with curves… but aren’t you a skinny blond? (sans pretentious name and perpetual squint as far as I know…

  2. The Beautiful Kind Says:
    September 26th, 2007 at 7:48 am

    I like contrast, m’dear. YOU would be good contrast, dontcha think?

  3. Mon-Mon Says:
    September 27th, 2007 at 8:02 am

    I wonder what the flights to your area look like today?

  4. Bob Says:
    October 1st, 2007 at 7:31 pm

    I occasionally look at your blog - which is fun, thought-provoking, and literary…oh, and hot!

    Anyway, thought you would appreciate this and I didn’t know where exactly to file it. Thought it might vex you though:

    http://www.boingboing.net/2007/10/01/supreme-court-denies.html

    (Not So) Sweet Home Alabama

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