The Beautiful Kind

Whenever I’m at a friend’s house and go in their bathroom and see reading material next to the toilet, I get acutely embarrassed, because immediately I imagine them sitting there taking a shit, and I’d rather not think about such things. Which is why I don’t keep reading material in the bathroom, cuz I don’t want other people imagining ME taking a shit.

But I’m brave and like to try new things, so I’m keeping this book in my bathroom to get over my corpapubliphobia (fear of others knowing you take a shit. I know, I know, Everyone Poops.)

(Sidenote: Yes, that’s a phone jack by the toilet. I wanted soo badly for a phone to be installed there, so I could be like Elvis, but instead it got put by the Liberace tub. Inexplicably, there’s is also a phone in the garage.)

This book features essays on blood, seniorsex, bestiality, sadism, and much, much more. Right now I’m reading about group masturbation. There’s this group in San Francisco who espouses

The San Francisco Jacks offer not only a solace of safety from disease, but better still, an effective new way to meet socially, intimately, physically and spiritually men who are defined by behavior as lusty, visually forward, and generous with their smiles, cocks, hugs, and conversations.

One man’s testimonial:

I remember walking into this amazing environment with a hundred men bathed in this red glowing light, all just jacking off, and I thought, “Wow! This is heaven! This is hell! I don’t care! I’m here! I love it!