The Beautiful Kind

When you eat or get dressed for the day, do you ever think about the possibility that you might get murdered later that day and more people than you ever wanted to know will know that you had circus peanuts for breakfast because they’ve found the partially digested bright orange bits in your stomach while they were performing your autopsy?

Or how about your outfit being described in the report: “Single white female, 33, 120 lbs., wearing aqua ‘Real men love unicorns’ t-shirt and yellow striped knee socks.” Or your bad tattoo? I know you’re dead and all, but isn’t it embarrassing? God I hope I don’t get murdered today, because I just ate a dorky candy bar. I am wearing a cool outfit though.