The Beautiful Kind

Hell I don’t even know where to begin. First of all, bad girl Buffy showed me this whacked blog. Honestly it rivals mine for ludicrousness. At least mine should be taken with a grain of salt. This…I think it’s serious.

OK so then we clicked on the Prairie Muffin link. I thought Prairie Muffin was another term for Cow Patty, which is pretty much BULLSHIT, and BINGO, that’s what it is. A long list on how to be a good Christian wife and serve everyone but yourself, with declarations like:

11) Prairie Muffins own aprons and they know how to use them. (ed. note: and here I wanted one for my houseboy)

and

17) Prairie Muffins place their husbands’ needs and desires above other obligations, arranging their schedules and responsibilities so that they do not neglect the one who provides for and protects them and their children.

and FUCK

18) Prairie Muffins are fiercely submissive to God and to their husbands.

so we thought, well what the hell are we? But of course. We are Gutter Tacos. The GT list looks something like this:

5) Gutter Tacos improve their intellect and knowledge as they have opportunity, first by completing their educations, then by reading good books, David Sedaris short stories, porn magazines, Savage Love and other materials which help them to make informed opinions about a wide variety of subjects.

and

11) Gutter Tacos own sex toys and they know how to use them.

and YESSS

13) Gutter Tacos practice hospitality by offering every man, woman and child who enters their home a chilled, shaken martini (vodka, gin, cosmo or chocolate, guests’ choice), even when their home is cluttered with condom wrappers and empty champagne bottles.

So there you have it. Yet another example of turning lemon into lemonade. Damn we’re good. Gutter Taco t-shirts coming soon.